Last Saturday, God took me to Psalm 37 and gave me three instructions. I’ve been focusing on them all week:
1.Delight in the Lord. He will give you the desires of your heart. To delight in the Lord means to focus all my energy on him. It means I should stop worrying and scurrying – just enjoy my time with him. He knows the desires of my heart, even better than I, but my greatest desire is to delight in him.
2.Commit everything to him and let him take care of it. It’s so easy for me to plan what I’m going to do, then forge ahead and do it with gusto. But God wants me to relax in his arms and let him be my Husband and my Maker. He’ll take care of the job, the finances and every other desire I have.
3.Be still and wait patiently. It’s been almost seven months since the lay-off. I thought surely I would have a job by now, but it hasn’t happened. For some reason, God has me living in the “pause” button when I would rather be on “play” or “fast forward.” He knows why and he knows where. I just need to be still and wait for him to work it out.
George Mueller once wrote that although the steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord, so are the stops. So I need to take his advice and focus on the three points God gave me. Then the future steps as well as this stop will be a blessing.
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
More & More Praise
Discouragement surrounded me this week. It had been a long time since the last interview – no calls, no answers, no job. It seemed as if my life was on “Pause.” I asked God, “When do we get to ‘Play’ or even ‘Fast Forward’?” No answer.
So, in the privacy of my living room, I did a scarf dance. The scarf dance is something I taught several years ago to my women’s Bible study in Lawrence. Each of us had a colorful scarf, and we used it as a tool of worship. We danced around my house to the music of “Celebrate Jesus”, swirling our scarves and swaying in praise.
This time, I was alone, except for the Lord. I sang my own version of the song, draped one of my silk scarves around me and just danced in worship. The discouragement left, and peace enveloped my soul.
The way to stay in hope is to praise God, over and over and over again. As King David reminds us in Psalm 71:14, “But as for me, I will always have hope; I will praise you more and more.”
So, in the privacy of my living room, I did a scarf dance. The scarf dance is something I taught several years ago to my women’s Bible study in Lawrence. Each of us had a colorful scarf, and we used it as a tool of worship. We danced around my house to the music of “Celebrate Jesus”, swirling our scarves and swaying in praise.
This time, I was alone, except for the Lord. I sang my own version of the song, draped one of my silk scarves around me and just danced in worship. The discouragement left, and peace enveloped my soul.
The way to stay in hope is to praise God, over and over and over again. As King David reminds us in Psalm 71:14, “But as for me, I will always have hope; I will praise you more and more.”
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
3 Powerful Verbs
“…Hope in God and wait expectantly for Him, for I shall yet praise Him, who is the help of my countenance and my God” (Ps. 43:5b).
Almost every day this week, God has reminded me in his about 3 powerful verbs. These verbs seem to be the action I need to take as I look forward to a job. One verb is Wait. That doesn’t mean I just sit around, eat chocolate and feel sorry for myself. I’m still going to job fairs, looking on the web for openings and making sure my resume is the best it can be. To wait on the Lord means to let him take care of the details, move his puzzle pieces around and open a door for me.
Hope is the 2nd verb. Staying in hope is important, because without it, the enemy throws discouragement down my throat. Hope is the action word for the foundation of faith. Because I know God has a good plan for me and still wants me to be his servant, I have hope that some day that job will appear.
The last verb is Expect. Although I’m doing everything I can to search for a job, prepare for interviews and listen to my network; I fully expect God to surprise me with something only he can do. He is the one who has gifted me and decided which works I would do “…Since the foundation of the world” (Eph. 2:10). I expect him to open doors that no one can shut, to help me be a witness wherever I go and to place me where I can serve him best.
Wait. Hope. Expect. 3 powerful verbs that I’m living with and focusing on this week. The only other verb I need is Praise.
Almost every day this week, God has reminded me in his about 3 powerful verbs. These verbs seem to be the action I need to take as I look forward to a job. One verb is Wait. That doesn’t mean I just sit around, eat chocolate and feel sorry for myself. I’m still going to job fairs, looking on the web for openings and making sure my resume is the best it can be. To wait on the Lord means to let him take care of the details, move his puzzle pieces around and open a door for me.
Hope is the 2nd verb. Staying in hope is important, because without it, the enemy throws discouragement down my throat. Hope is the action word for the foundation of faith. Because I know God has a good plan for me and still wants me to be his servant, I have hope that some day that job will appear.
The last verb is Expect. Although I’m doing everything I can to search for a job, prepare for interviews and listen to my network; I fully expect God to surprise me with something only he can do. He is the one who has gifted me and decided which works I would do “…Since the foundation of the world” (Eph. 2:10). I expect him to open doors that no one can shut, to help me be a witness wherever I go and to place me where I can serve him best.
Wait. Hope. Expect. 3 powerful verbs that I’m living with and focusing on this week. The only other verb I need is Praise.
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
Caring for Mothers
During the past couple of weeks, I was in Oklahoma, caring for my mother. It was a strange experience, because it was actually my sister who was in need of care. Kris had an extensive back surgery that required a 360 operation – front and back. She was in ICU for a while, in the post-op ward for a couple of days and then in rehab. Thankfully, she has now returned home and will do follow-up rehab from there.
But Kris lives with Mom and helps to care for her. So someone needed to be there, to help Mom with her confusing issues and be her comfort during the evenings. Since I don’t yet have a job, I volunteered.
Why is it so difficult to switch roles? Perhaps because mothers are the strength and the heart of the home for so many years. They are the ones who fix our meals, wipe our tears and bandage our boo-boos. We owe them a great deal of love and respect.
Yet now, my mother is losing some of her short-term memories. Time and space boundaries are disappearing in the fog of early dementia. It takes an incredible amount of patience to just be around Mom, to answer the same questions over and over, to make sure she doesn’t follow her confusion rather than reality.
I do not understand why this is happening to my mother, and I don’t like it one bit. After watching Dad suffer through Alzheimer’s for 10 years, I don’t think it is fair that his care-giver now has some of the same difficulties. But that’s just the way it is.
All I can do is pray for her, continue to honor and respect her, send a card on Mother’s Day and pray like crazy that I don’t do the same thing to my son.
But Kris lives with Mom and helps to care for her. So someone needed to be there, to help Mom with her confusing issues and be her comfort during the evenings. Since I don’t yet have a job, I volunteered.
Why is it so difficult to switch roles? Perhaps because mothers are the strength and the heart of the home for so many years. They are the ones who fix our meals, wipe our tears and bandage our boo-boos. We owe them a great deal of love and respect.
Yet now, my mother is losing some of her short-term memories. Time and space boundaries are disappearing in the fog of early dementia. It takes an incredible amount of patience to just be around Mom, to answer the same questions over and over, to make sure she doesn’t follow her confusion rather than reality.
I do not understand why this is happening to my mother, and I don’t like it one bit. After watching Dad suffer through Alzheimer’s for 10 years, I don’t think it is fair that his care-giver now has some of the same difficulties. But that’s just the way it is.
All I can do is pray for her, continue to honor and respect her, send a card on Mother’s Day and pray like crazy that I don’t do the same thing to my son.
Thursday, April 29, 2010
The Significance of Help
After spending a week in Oklahoma with family, I am grateful again for the timing of God. The last few months, my energy has been focused on trying to find a job. I have wondered why nothing has surfaced. Even after seven interviews and 65 completed applications, nothing has happened. Yet this week, I began to see why. My sister and my family needed me.
It was an intense surgery, lasting 13 hours from beginning to final recovery. The rehab will be painful and at least three months long, but my sister has some relief already from the pinched nerves, the degenerated discs and the scoliosis. My mother, who has been fearful, has had a week of someone else in the house. We have driven around town, we have visited the doctor, we have eaten together and discussed family business.
Although my mind has been focused on the job search, God sees the larger picture. He is fully capable of providing the job I need at the exact time he has decreed. He reminds me not to be so selfish about my needs, but to do all I can to help family – for such a time as this.
We find significance in our work, but we also find great value in being able to help others. This week, I return to Kansas City and once again, search and pray. But for the last weeks of April, I was free and available to do something even more important than my own needs – to help others.
And isn’t that a higher call?
It was an intense surgery, lasting 13 hours from beginning to final recovery. The rehab will be painful and at least three months long, but my sister has some relief already from the pinched nerves, the degenerated discs and the scoliosis. My mother, who has been fearful, has had a week of someone else in the house. We have driven around town, we have visited the doctor, we have eaten together and discussed family business.
Although my mind has been focused on the job search, God sees the larger picture. He is fully capable of providing the job I need at the exact time he has decreed. He reminds me not to be so selfish about my needs, but to do all I can to help family – for such a time as this.
We find significance in our work, but we also find great value in being able to help others. This week, I return to Kansas City and once again, search and pray. But for the last weeks of April, I was free and available to do something even more important than my own needs – to help others.
And isn’t that a higher call?
Wednesday, April 21, 2010
Joy in Bloom
Flowers give me so much joy, and this year – they are spectacular. Since we had such a wet winter, the trees and flowers are abundant with color and texture. It’s been hard to pass by some of the nurseries and not buy any flowers (trying to save money), but last week God provided a gift. I used part of it for some yellow flowers in the front of the house.
It has been said that yellow flowers cheer up any room. I think that’s true, and the bright yellow seems to be everywhere this year. Besides flowers, I’ve seen yellow blouses, chartreuse jackets and even canary-yellow shoes. As soon as I get a job, I plan to buy something yellow for my wardrobe.
But in the meantime, I’ve planted a few yellow zinnias in front that cheer me every time I drive up to the house. They remind me of God’s provision this week and of the need to stay encouraged and live in hope. A few yellow flowers are worth it to keep my spirits up and my thoughts on the Creator.
It has been said that yellow flowers cheer up any room. I think that’s true, and the bright yellow seems to be everywhere this year. Besides flowers, I’ve seen yellow blouses, chartreuse jackets and even canary-yellow shoes. As soon as I get a job, I plan to buy something yellow for my wardrobe.
But in the meantime, I’ve planted a few yellow zinnias in front that cheer me every time I drive up to the house. They remind me of God’s provision this week and of the need to stay encouraged and live in hope. A few yellow flowers are worth it to keep my spirits up and my thoughts on the Creator.
Thursday, April 15, 2010
Lessons of Unemployment
Although being unemployed is scary, I have been trying to find some positives in the situation. Some of the blessings I’ve discovered are:
• TIME – on the days I don’t do temp work, I have more time to read books, think about God and stroll through the local nurseries – smelling not only the roses, but all the other flowers.
• MEDITATION – thinking more about trust and about who God is. Can I really trust him to come through and find me a job? If not, then what’s wrong with my faith?
• CREATIVITY – since I’m a writer, I’m always being creative with my words. But now I’m also learning creativity with the budget. How far can I stretch those vegetables? How many dishes can I make from one stir fry? Answer – as many as possible until they’re gone.
• PATIENCE – Psalm 40:1 reminds me not only to wait for God to answer, but also to wait patiently. That means, don’t complain. Focus on blessings.
• KINDNESS – God’s people are kind. Some have sent cash, one friend mailed a grocery gift card, others sent greetings and confirmation that they are praying. Every kindness is a like a breath of scented air.
• SECURITY – my faith is built on nothing less than Jesus Christ. Jobs are extra benefits, places of work where we can influence people and try to do some good in this world. Jobs are not our security. When the job is gone, God is still here.
• FAMILY – my extended family lives in Oklahoma, but I know they pray for me. My family here is my son and our animals. I’m spending as much time as possible doing things with them. This blesses me as well as them.
I truly hope that a job appears soon, and I need it to happen soon. But in the meantime, I’ll keep looking for the blessings of unemployment and stay in hope.
• TIME – on the days I don’t do temp work, I have more time to read books, think about God and stroll through the local nurseries – smelling not only the roses, but all the other flowers.
• MEDITATION – thinking more about trust and about who God is. Can I really trust him to come through and find me a job? If not, then what’s wrong with my faith?
• CREATIVITY – since I’m a writer, I’m always being creative with my words. But now I’m also learning creativity with the budget. How far can I stretch those vegetables? How many dishes can I make from one stir fry? Answer – as many as possible until they’re gone.
• PATIENCE – Psalm 40:1 reminds me not only to wait for God to answer, but also to wait patiently. That means, don’t complain. Focus on blessings.
• KINDNESS – God’s people are kind. Some have sent cash, one friend mailed a grocery gift card, others sent greetings and confirmation that they are praying. Every kindness is a like a breath of scented air.
• SECURITY – my faith is built on nothing less than Jesus Christ. Jobs are extra benefits, places of work where we can influence people and try to do some good in this world. Jobs are not our security. When the job is gone, God is still here.
• FAMILY – my extended family lives in Oklahoma, but I know they pray for me. My family here is my son and our animals. I’m spending as much time as possible doing things with them. This blesses me as well as them.
I truly hope that a job appears soon, and I need it to happen soon. But in the meantime, I’ll keep looking for the blessings of unemployment and stay in hope.
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